Monday, February 25, 2013
Less is More Sometimes (More or less anyway)
We talked a lot about how those parts of her are not the only facts, not the only parts of her. She is also funny and kind, generous and a great listener. She is quite a good photographer and talented graphic artist. Sometimes we and others can tend to focus only our (and other's) pathologies and not also account for the rest of our parts.
Still, my friend felt helped by her sponsor's honesty and candid comments. She felt that by accepting all the parts of her self, she could begin in real earnestness to have more. Not necessarily more spouses, or lovers or hobbies, jobs or money- though we do sometimes need to assess whether a change in relationship or job or living environment may be the way to go- but more peace, more insight, more joy, more attention to her spirit, and more ease and more relief. And because less is more sometimes: less self pity, less self attack, less reliance on others for too many of her emotional needs.
And somehow we got to thinking that it's first things first sometimes. It may be better to have a better internal life first rather than attempting to change our boss, spouse, kids. When we have more inside, it's much easier to figure out if, when and how we need to have more outside.